Becoming Badass

Things had been going pretty well on good ol planet Earth. With everyone networked socially, communication around the globe was more instant than ever. I only wish that when I first heard the term "gone viral" I knew what it would lead to.

You see, I had a thought one day in the lazy days of a hot August afternoon, sitting on the roof of my porch with my roommates in London Ontario. We were having the usual university student conversation, namely talking about absolutely nothing important but defending it till the end of time. It was this fateful day that I threw out the idea of 'Earth Population Zero'.

The premise was simple and, dare I say, magnificent.

"OK" I began "So before I get going, here is the breakdown.".
You see if you were going to ever come up with an idea, you would need to cover all - and I mean ALL - you bases, or else you would be flamed and your brilliance would go unrecognized.

"Everything is good, and everyone on Earth agrees. There are no douchey teenagers, no kids just being a buzz kill, EVERYONE on Earth is in agreement with Population Zero. The premise is simple, at a certain time, on a certain day, of a certain month - which has all been organized and agreed to - everyone on Earth will jump at the same time."

One of my roommates was quick to ask "What about people in wheelchairs? In hospitals? Babies?"

"Ah, like I said it's all been organized. People will come together to lift others up as they jump. Parents will hold children. EVERYONE is in agreement. For the 2-3 seconds that everyone is in the air, for the first time since humanities existence, the human population of Earth will be ZERO."

"Whoa" another of my eloquent buddies said "So you mean like, not a single human on the planet?"

"Yes. Exactly." (I paused for dramatic effect) "Now....what do you think would happen?"