Becoming Badass

Life is good, everyone is doing something together. Something we will never forget. The human experience, humanity as one.

Tic-tic-tic.

Zombies.

I came back down to Earth on the balls of my feet with a muscle memory that I never knew would be important. I had chosen a spot out in a park to experience my creation, not entirely secluded, but quiet enough. As soon as I touched back down I had that intangible sense.

Something is afoot. Potvin! Block the driveway!

I could feel the tension, like a storm was coming and it was gonna hit me hard. Then I heard the sound from movies, TV shows, video games, music, and every other media to ever exist:

"MMMrrrroofofffgggffgf"

Whenever I've talked with people about their first, they all remember it in perfect detail. Branded instantly into their longest of the long term memory. My experience was no less memorable.

I looked left toward the sound and saw it. I say IT, because that's what IT is, an 'IT'. I am lucky that my care switch is turned firmly to off when dealing with these pesky bastards and I quickly dehumanize them.

Anyway, it stood there as is if someone from a movie set had stumbled away from work for Population Zero and was doing their best to scare me.

Let's go over the check marks for Stereo Typed Zombie shall we?

1 - Greyish business suit, black bile & gore stains? Check
2 - One leg (in this case the left ankle) torqued at an ungodly angle? Check
3 - Head cranked to the left? Check
4 - One arm reaching with that 'me want eat you' reach? You know it



It had other memorable features I would love to forget too, but I think you get it.

It was a zombie.
It was hungry for brains.
And it was trying to eats mine.